A Cup of Comfort

a_cup_of_comfort_people_and_thoughts

I love to see one of my friends Whats App profile pic. The pic is cute because it has her and her lovely daughter in it (before you guess something, let me tell you that this pic above isn’t her ). It makes me feel fresh, its completely new experience every time. I love to check it once in a day because her daughters just entrance in this world and their just started relationship, that silent growing love, trying to know each other, wow…it’s just more than anything in this world…

It’s a transition between a stage where she was a girl enjoying her hostel life, her study, her friends few days before and now she has these serious responsibilities as a parent as well as complete new world evolved with excitements…

This articles isn’t dedicated to her, meaning I’m not instructing her with this…she is lot more mature than me but her profile pic just made me to write my views about Do’s and Don’ts for such new parents…It would be good opportunity for me to appreciate the love between parents and child.

  • You should always compare your child’s childhood with something you could not experience during your childhood. It’s always a good opportunity for a parent. Learn to capture those tiny emotions, those innocent thoughts behind that pretty face of your child. It’s not about completing every of their wish but its more about understanding their thoughts and letting them know how it’s right or wrong. Be like a child sometimes and be a part of their childish happiness.
  • Always remember this thing that problems can’t always be solved by being angry. I appreciate the workload you might have during the day and the emotional imbalances you have in life but it’s your child and he/she isn’t that mature as you are. It’s okay to have that fake smile on your face and convince him/her to go to sleep.
  • When you child wants you to listen something or tell you something, give your 100%. Show that excitement on your face about the things he/she wants to say. Show that you want to listen whatever they want to say.
  • When your child is at early stage of learning, probably first 10’s of their life, it’s where you need to be careful with every of your move. No matter how your day was, you should have at least few minutes of talk with your child asking him/her how his/her day was, something new in the school etc. Don’t miss that opportunity to hug them every time. It makes them feel special.
  • Always keep watch on behaviors of their friends. We had our past and we know how being with right/wrong people changes your personality. It’s completely better to tell them not to be with some of his friends who is not good.
  • Give them lots and lots of story, educational books to read. It could be ‘Harry potter’ or ‘Reader digest’. Always keep track of the things they like/dislike. As a good parent, we should accept that they are going to be naughty or childish sometimes. It’s okay to tell them same explanation every time they make mistake.
  • Spare some time in your day, probably at the end of the day to check out their study. This thing has helped me a lot. My mom used to take my study every day. This thing has developed a habit and interest in me to study at least a little every day.
  • Always appreciate little things they do. Congrats them for some competition they won. Tell him that he/she is looking good today, Say hi, bye every time you meet, have your dinner together. Teach them the patience they need at times too.
  • Learn to neglect few low priority mistakes they make or tell them why it’s good or bad. Explain the truth behind every good or bad thing they do. It’s okay to let them enjoy the rain once in a while than protecting them from getting wet.
  • Always feel free to share your childhood moments with them. This is something that every parent does but show them how good your life was rather than telling them how bad it was and what you hadn’t had in your childhood.
  • Keep cracking jokes at home. Keep environment cool than being tensed. Always try to give best explanation for everything they ask you. No matter how small or deep their question is. If you think they are too small to understand, create some story out of it which will make it easier for them to understand it.
  • Once they grow up, probably around 11th to 20th of their age, slowly start monitoring them more but instructing less. You may want to tell them to be careful with the world and you make sure that they don’t get addicted or they don’t develop few habits of their friends. It’s a common practice we know. The good solution for this thing is to continuously show how much you care for them…it’s the age where they start understanding the things we do, the family problems we have, the world around etc. but on the other hand its very critical too because they don’t understand what’s right and what’s wrong. And that’s where your role is in those age of their life.
  • As they grow up, probably around 20th to 25th of their age, start losing your interference in their lives at the same time don’t lose it all at a time. Of course everything has priority. I don’t mean to lose all control but stop interfering the low priority ones. E.g. asking your child why he was late to come to home is more important than asking him to study. Isn’t it? Because being so young, he now knows that he need to study but he doesn’t at all understand that being so late at night at home is a bad habit and can lead him to develop some habits like smoking.
  • As they grow up, as they keep on getting experiences, you can teach them to notice how such experiences brought them down or lifted them up. Your role just goes on becoming narrower and narrower.
  • Their life after 25th to 30th of their age is where they get married and start their own life ahead and they are supposed to be completely matured to go ahead with their own lives. As a parent, it’s now your time to relax, start living your life, and see your child going up high in the sky …

 

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